Guides on ADULTING- 2 of 3.LOVE

LYF4U MOTIVATIONAL NEWSLETTER

June 29, 2026

MAREES MOTIVATIONAL MAGIC

Understand  life through the wisdom of the ages, but view life through the eyes of a child.

Hello and always a warm-hearted welcome to this community service., where I am continuing from your last newsletter.

Adulting is about "taking full responsibility for where you are in your life."

You can complain about your life, and some of it may be what feels  totally fair:

 Many of us were dealt some really lousy cards, and things have happened to us that we had no control over.. 

Yet if you want to pull yourself out of child mode you have to choose to accept where you’re at—completely. 

That’s the beginning of programming or rebuilding your new self.

And the way to do that is by taking full responsibility for where you’re at.  There are many of reasons to be in  victims. But a victim mindset does nothing but turn you into a prisoner.

What does taking full responsibility of your life look like?

3. Love hard and responsibly.

You may have been hurt.

Odds are we all have. 

But loving from a place of hurt isn’t loving.

It’s hiding. And you will never hit the high notes of love you’re searching for if you’re hiding.

 It’s a challenge, but love as deeply as you can. Don’t give yourself any other choice. Be fearless.

Be vulnerable. Show yourself. Put yourself out there, completely.

Eyes closed. Arms folded. Knowing he or she may not catch you.

And what if you get hurt? 

You probably will. But what’s the alternative? Love with fear?

 What would that look like? You know. You’ve been there before.

 So you have to make a difficult choice that will, at times, bring you a lot of resistance based on the past.

The thing is ... You have to let go of control, predictions, and expectations, and just practice love in its purest form, without fear.

You have to stop wrestling logic and ego, and stand on the ledge with a smile, knowing that loving someone else as much as you can will always be more about you than anyone else.

The other half is responsibility. I’ll break it down to its simplest form: It means to communicate. 

4. Don’t leave people in the dark.

We all know that when we sign up to love someone, we are also signing up for possible hurt. That’s the name of the game, and there’s no way around it.

But there’s a difference between a broken heart and unnecessary hurt from being irresponsible—or from being a coward.

It takes courage to be vulnerable and honest. It takes courage to show yourself and have tough conversations. It takes courage to draw boundaries. It takes courage to not make it about you. It takes courage to love responsibly.

  What is a truth you need to swallow in your life right now, and why is it so hard to swallow this truth?

Most likely, the answer is fear. What does it mean if you finally own  this truth? How will it change your life? How will it change other people’s lives?

5. Check your ego.

There is a healthy dose of ego that we all need.

I’m referring here to a state where one is ego-driven, manipulating everything to circle around them, and finding a way to always make it about them, so they can gain and stand in the spotlight. What these people don’t know is that their ego is blocking their potential.

Along with fear, ego is the other wall that will prevent you from becoming all you can be. Our power will always be in giving, not taking. We all have ego, and it can swell fast.

Adulting means being aware of it and choosing to pull from a different place. Children pull from their egos; adults pull from their hearts.

6. Call people back.

No one does this anymore. We’ve become so accustomed to texting and instant messaging that real voices bring us anxiety now.

Why call when we can just text? Technology is training us to hide behind our phones, instead of using them for what they were originally meant for.

If someone actually picks up the phone and calls you, you should call them back. (Unless they’re your parents. Kidding.) They want to talk to you, not text you—or they would have just sent a text. Don’t allow technology to create gaps and disconnect in your relationships.

Technology should be a tool to connect better, not a crowbar to separate us. Adults call people back.

7. Take care of your own stuff.

Children make their problems other people’s problems. They don’t have the self-awareness or the capacity to hold space for others. They vomit. And we allow it, because they’re children.

 But adults do have the capacity, even though many chose not to exercise it. If you want to adult, you must be aware of your own perceptions, problems, issues, and triggers, and how they affect other people, especially in your relationships. 

If you don’t take care of your own stuff, boundaries are blurred, and you will set yourself up for an adult/child dynamic instead of adult/adult. And then don’t be surprised when you wake up one day and your partner tells you their feelings have changed. The truth is that the relationship dynamic shifted, which changed their feelings. Be wise enough to seek help when you need it.

8. Be grateful.

Children just want more and more and more. Adults want different things. Well, some adults just want more and more and more—but then, they are not adults.

Because if that’s all you want, there is no room to practice gratitude, and adults practice gratitude. 

Be grateful for everything you have, including all the chapters of your life you want to rip out, all your expired relationships, all of the challenges, struggles, and turbulence you face—all of that you will get through, like you got through it before.

Be grateful for all the lessons you’ve learned and how they have transformed you into a better version of yourself.

Be grateful for all of your relationships, even if they can be challenging sometimes.

Be grateful that you have choices.

As you move through the stages of your life, you will invariably learn that things aren’t always as they are cracked up to be.

 As amazing as life can be, there are also tough truths that you tend not to acknowledge until they are staring you in the face. So, it's always a case of Carpe Diem. Make the very best out of your incredible life because you and it are truly a gift. Unwrapping it, sharing it, learning from it, and transforming through it is where the fun lies. 

Several years ago-I was asked along with 22 other woman from 22 others countries to co author a book on Personal Transformation. I stongly believe we ALL have the power to change.

I'm walking and sitting with you all the way.x

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